Resiliance (Resistance)

Like a true mama bear, I have been very focused on the short shrift my 17-year-old has gotten in her lifetime. Born in the 2008 recession, she saw a few years of hope before the first T presidency, then covid (and the ensuing reactions which, though prudent and warranted, made us all feel isolated and like we were going to die any minute), and getting covid, and distance learning, and George Floyd's murder, and the uprisings, and now the second T debacle and chaos. 

And she's had a lot of changes at school, as well, with leadership changes and counselors changing and her class in particular missing out on any number of school traditions.

And the upcoming college admissions uncertainty, including "the cliff" and the loss of international students and financial aid/Department of Education chaos.

It's no wonder I'm kind of salty about it.

But in a school meeting yesterday ("Looking ahead to senior year" — gulp!), in conversation, I began to realize the flip side of it.

Her year in particular has had to build an unparalleled amount of resilience. They have had to pivot, and turn, and make the best of things, and adjust expectations again and again and again. They have remade, and reshaped, and tried again. They have given up on dreams, and found new ones, and then found them again.

And here's the thing. This is normal for them. They don't know any other way. This is the only way they know. This is their strength.

So I, for one, need to let go of the language of scarcity and take their lead and admire the amazing things these kids can do, will do, and are doing. To say, rather than "You missed out on X," instead "Wow, you did Y!"



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Brutus

Image
In 2019, we were on our way back from spring break when Cheryl, who Beatrix had interned with at GiffyDog, reached out to us about fostering a pomeranian (since she knew Beatrix loved the breed). The day we got back, the person who had been fostering him brought him over. Brutus sauntered in, grabbed a rawhide as long as he was that Coya had been chewing, and settled in next to me in the chair. Patrick says "I knew at that point he was never leaving." And he didn't. He got the name "Brutus Brewpup" when, as we initially had him and thought we should expose him to people who might want to adopt him, we took him out to a taproom and found he LOVED it. Pretty soon, taking him to taprooms turned into a regular pastime. But he liked other things too. He loved Christmas: And Halloween: And springtime: And snow, especially the first snowfall: And really winter in general: He loved to go up to the cabin (and I'm so glad we got to go up this last weekend): And to sun...
Read more

WOOF

Image
No, not that kind of woof, unless you have a lead on a pomeranian that needs a home... I have declared this week my WOOF — Week Of Outstanding Filing. My friend Charles proves how well he knows my by commenting: But this is exactly why it is needed. On Saturday, most of my home office looked like this: Or, if stacked, this: After a few filing sessions, it now looks like this — definitely some room for improvement, but better. And after some similar time at a client's today, my in-box there, which had been too full to add anything more to, looks like this: In attending to this filing, which is definitely my Achilles heel, I am making some progress in the rest of my life. And that feels good.
Read more

New York (Area) College Visits

Image
Though we have had a lot of fun and spent time with friends this trip (more on that later), the main reason was COLLEGE VISITING and we hit that out of the park! We started bright and early Wednesday with Sarah Lawrence, which is where we learned not to trust how long Maps says it takes to get somewhere because east coast traffic suddenly gets a lot longer while you are driving (I had kind of forgotten about that). We arrived late, but still within the info session. When we started on the tour we realized how magical this lovely little campus is (perhaps right around the time we turned the corner to see the deer grazing on the hillside). We loved the thoughtful way the school goes about scheduling and the great social sense. It was a wonderful way to start college visits! After a delicious sushi lunch, we headed over to Hofstra, which was quite a contrast. I know many refer to it as a hidden gem, but after our guide had never heard of Minnesota and had trouble subtracting 5 from 7 when...
Read more