all that's past is prologue...

Christmas 2025. The Ordway for Jesus Christ Superstar on December 23. Beatrix's last Christmas at home. Just yesterday, seemingly, she was this old: All the feels.

I hope you all know at least one person as spectacular as my friend Marta. I fist met Marta when our kids were in elementary school, and I attended an amazing presentation session she gave at Expo (somewhat of a sister school to Randolph Heights) on the importance of Payments In Lieu Of Taxes (PILOTS). Marta's presentation was brilliant. I was in awe. I had known her tangentially through mutual friend groups, but had never encountered her force in depth and in person. You know, that feeling when someone you sort of knew turns out to be a SUPERSTAR? And then afterwards? Twitter was still a thing, and she tweeted something about similar about me! (still totally unwarranted, but I'll take it). Over these years, Marta has been That Friend, over and over again. The one who shows up with food when my dad was first sick, and a wrap when I broke my wrist and could not put on sweaters. But also who has reached out when she needed an ear, knowing that true friendship is reciprocal. We...

The most Saint Paul thing happened to us tonight. We decided to go out for a drink after both working the CJ show, and wanted to go to a Christmas-themed bar. My friend Kate had said we should check out the Eagles Bar over on the East Side where she volunteers, because they were decked out for Christmas and had drink specials for $6. Let me just point out here that the holiday bar at the Omni hotel in Eagan's holiday drinks are $25+, so we were sold. The minute we walked in, as we headed for some bar stools, we ran into our friends Barry and Kristen. Turns out our friend Jane Prince holds her annual holiday party potluck there, so all of a sudden we were crashing her party ("I *thought* I invited you!" mused Jane) and ran into literally scores of friends to hang out with.  Plus we had desserts.  Plus we ran into other people, like a different Barry who we had hung out with at the Kaohly Her election night party. His wife has been instrumental in revitalizing the place. He...

It's Early Decision time for many colleges and universities — Tufts University, my own alma mater, included. Beatrix did not apply to Tufts, and it breaks my heart just a little, while at the same time I know that she is on her own decision path and needs to make her own choices. Whatever school she picks will be So Damn Lucky to have her. She's had great support from her school in applications, and I'm so proud of her. SPA had college counselors when I was there, but it was different. It was a much more self-directed search. Kids applied to fewer schools. My class, the class of 1985, was an over-achieving brainiac class, and my 3.85 GPA did not place me high in the pack; also, there was a lot less of a focus on other activities than there is now. Beatrix was even horrified to realize I had to *mail* in my application, which I typed. I visited Tufts on a whim, of sorts. I had one college visit trip, where I accompanied my mom to Boston for a conference and did visits on my ...

In 2010, we replaced our original 1886 ("Burns wood or coal!") octopus furnace with a "high efficiency, modern" model. Not a day goes by when I have not cursed its inefficient, loud system; our old furnace may have been temperamental sometimes, but gravity heat was amazing. My father-in-law, who is housesitting, told us yesterday that the heat was struggling to stay above 60 degrees, and today it was red-tagged after we finally found someone this afternoon to come take a look at it (kind of a struggle from 1,200 miles away on the day after Thanksgiving). The fact that a 10K furnace lasts only 15 years — SUCKS.  We start the drive back tomorrow and will arrive Sunday night to...a lot to handle. These 4-to-5-figure housing expenses a couple of times a year (this is on top of a huge landscaping debacle at Summit just last week that will that will likely cost 8-10K to rectify) are getting really stressful. But I am incredibly grateful for friends: for Jessica, who broug...

One of the reasons we like the drive down to New Orleans every year is that it gives us time to reset and reflect on the way down. We have our traditions that are a big part of the trip. We leave early after kitty scratches and puppy pats to last a full week long (though maybe a little later than we wanted, but Patrick made up time on the road). We eat brunch in Iowa City. It used to be at the Hamburg Inn 2, but they changed hands a few years back and are not as good, so the last couple years it's been at the Dandy Lion. We drive through Hannibal and make remarks about Mark Twain. We get all the way to Cape Girardeau before we stop for the night. We always stay at the same Drury Inn, where there is free dinner (and 3 drinks!) at the Kickback Hour. The first time we encountered this phenomenon Beatrix was tiny, we had been driving all day, and we almost wept with joy to have someone feed us dinner and give us huge cups of wine. We watch Hallmark Christmas specials (this one, A  Buff...

  Our friend T, who is currently living at the Summit house, is The Best. Recently, however, she hired someone to clean up the leaves in the yard there who was ... NOT the best. Because I believe in people, I am choosing to believe that he wanted to do a good job and prepare the yard for winter. But what he did instead, due to a lack of knowledge or who knows what else, was to decimate it, and sadly, that happened when no one was around to witness the destruction until it was too late. Not everyone is as devoted as we are to leaving stems up for pollinators, etc., and I get that. But this was, um, extreme. The lilac my mom planted as one of her last things cut to a stump. The sour cherry tree that overproduces every summer cut back drastically, and the wisteria next to it also. The smoke tree hacked up. Banks of 50+ year old peonies scraped to the ground, along with phlox, iris, siberian iris, sedum, amsonia, rhubarb, lemon balm, wild petunias, astilbe, joe pie weed, false indigo, ...

This is my Brandy Alexander from the Lex last night. We have a tradition of going there every opening night at SPA, with Beatrix's friend F and her family (F's mom and I have been friends since before F and B were even conceived.) I don't know that I have ever mentioned how much that family — or this tradition — means to me. When we walked in last night, the host was like "Oh yes, you're back!" and they took amazing care of us, and put us in the corner table where we always sit, and treated us like rockstars. Beatrix has leftover chocolate cake for breakfast. This all makes me so happy! When our server, Sage, found out the show was called The Dining Room , she said "Welcome to MY dining room!" -- I want you to really understand how important this show is to Beatrix. In September, just a short time after school started, her beloved theater teacher Seves had a massive stroke and has been on medical leave, slowly recovering, since then. Seves has been a...

A couple of things about me: 1. I have a hefty bucket list 2. I have serious FOMO So, since "see the Northern Lights again" was on my bucket list, I had to go out and see them tonight. Seriously, they were so bright — even here with all the light pollution — it was magical! The top one was in Webster Park at the end of my block. Then I headed down to the golf course: We are so lucky to live in a world with these dancing lights!

We just got back from a really fun Cemetery Scavenger Hunt from Talk Death  (@talkdeathdaily). I don't think we won any prizes, because uploading the pictures was really slow and we only got 6 uploaded by the deadline (we only had 45 minutes) but we had a ton of fun wandering through Oakland Cemetery! We found: a columbarium someone whose first name is a month a non-US flag doves poppies a pet ivy leaves a nickname a quote a broken column a Celtic knot calla lilies someone born in a leap year a bench a grave with more than 3 colors a tree real moss on a gravestone Before yoga, Patrick and I headed to Raspberry Island to see the alebrijes before they were taken down today (I'm a bad CSTAR member, we funded the project and they have been up for months, but we just had not made it there.) I'm so glad we got there for the last day!