Slipping Through My Fingers

Having a high school senior is quite a ride.

They tell you about the importance of college, and all there is to get ready for it and to apply.

They tell you to appreciate all the "lasts" — like the last first day of school, the last Homecoming, the last circus registration, etc. They even warn you that you might now know it's a last, like the last time, years ago, that you read your kid a bedtime story before they just decided they would read the book themselves.

Ostensibly, you know how that it's great to see your kid grow up and be a person. And to be honest, I am kind of in awe of the person that Beatrix is growing to be.

But holy cow, what they DON'T tell you is that navigating all of this at once is almost impossible. That one minute you are stressing about colleges, and then you are proudly attending a school event, and then you are harshly reminding her that "An event DOES NOT exist if you don't put it on the calendar!"

You are (well, your husband is) driving them from the homecoming dance to change to a party when the text arrives right before they get there that they are at capacity, so they go to the Mexican restaurant to meet other friends to the park to someone's house to home (with a stop to drop off another kid).

You are sad that it's their last fall play auditions — except you are really thrown for a loop, because their much-beloved theater teacher is out all fall with an unexpected emergency, so maybe *last* year was actually their last audition for Seves (I told you it's those unexpected things that get you!)

You are firmly double-checking on homework while knowing that next year they'll be on their own.

Your are realizing your kid talks to you more on FaceTime when you are away at a conference than she does when you're in the same house. And remembering when she was in elementary school and you and your husband spent 2 nights away from her for a conference, and she was in tears every night at her friend's house.

I am 100% not ready for this, and it's going way too fast!

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