Don't Yuk Someone Else's Yum

Ok, to start out with, we're all tired. As one friend put it the other day, "We're all doing our best, but we're not doing the best that can be done."

We're not getting together in person, so our interactions are mainly via social media. This is a hard medium to use effectively, where something you posted that you thought was a light joke can easily get read as a mean-spirited remark, and vice versa.

And in a time where our values are being tested, it can seem all the more important to ensure that others know what we stand for, and all the more important to speak up.

But in the last week, I've seen some virtue-signaling by social media that just plain sits uncomfortably with me. Statements like "Don't buy Obama's book, he doesn't need the money! You should be buying from a small local press instead!" Or on Give to the Max Day  "I don't know why you are giving to the arts. Obviously social service is WAY more important right now."

Now these instances it especially uncomfortably with me because I both want to read Obama's book and like small presses, and have clients that are both arts groups and social services. But I will posit that anything that sets up a dichotomy of having to exclude one thing in order to support another is not doing anyone any favors. I'm tired of the "pie" metaphor where there are only so many pieces to go around; I'm interested in everyone getting dessert (in my case, Muddy Paws cheesecake...)

So here's a suggestion (and one I'm taking to heart, because I'm far from perfect in this as well.) Learn from my improv friends, and go full bore "Yes AND..." Buy Obama's book AND something from Coffee House Press, and get them both from Storied Owl or Next Chapter or Subtext or the Red Balloon. Give to arts and social services and other charities, and if you don't have enough money to go around (because that's where the pie can be very real), support them by volunteering, or even just a retweet. If someone asks about places to support, don't disparage other people's suggestions, but instead focus on why your place is fabulous and deserving.

Or, as Beatrix says, "Don't yuk someone else's yum."